in need of assistance

There I was on the toilet. Doing my thing. and then to my own horror I realized: I was out of TP.

I looked to my left. wall. my right. tub. I was surrounded by everything that was not about to be used as a wiping utility.

My stupid self forgot to put the TP on the TP shelf next to the toilet. Instead, for some odd reason, I decided underneath the sink would be a better spot this time. *facepalm*

what did I do?

did I dare get up and shrug it off and go natural?

teach the cat to fetch?

waggle across the two feet my arm couldnt reach and grab it myself?

I did all I could do: I called J.

THIS is why I need a dog. so I can teach it to save me when the TP is not where it should have been all along.

"go lassie! kortnii is trapped in the potty! get the TP asnap!"

Unlike almost everyone else in the world, Ive never had a dog before. So I am on a hunt to find me one. I am trying to get ahold of a Sheltie Resuce Center for they are the size and playfulness I am ready to handle according to google. and I think they will be nice to the cat. who knows.

the real question is: will the cat be nice to the pup?

Speaking of the cat [yeah its an animal day, get over it] everytime I walk up to my cat when he is sprawled out on the bedspread, he gives me this look like,

"oh god. not again. really? youre waking me up again? as soon as I fall asleep you have to rub me awake to tell me how cute I am. As if I didnt already know."

and sort of glares at me. Yeah. of course it makes me lol. but it also freaks me out that I can almost have conversations with his eyes. its. not. ok.

and no. Im not lonely. I just have a high respect for my animals. end of story.

Xk

Ps. Have you noticed something missing? yeah. me too.

my first creeptastic thursday has still not been able to air.

why not, you ask?

well I took a 5 day vacation. no. no where fun. a vacation in my own home. without internet use.

yeah I cried a little.

But it turned out to be a good thing. I got a lot of writing and art and music done while I was on my mini vacation. Even a new idea for a non-vampire related novel/story. yeah Im freakin amazing.

pps. yes. I have long ps' sometimes. get over it.

What The Manatee?

So much to tell, so little....ok Ive got plenty of time.

So blogger dot com peeps, whats on the upside? yeah, I can be lame too.

Anyway! When I was on my way to an amazingly small and crusty venue known as Swing State with J to see frantastical music played, I decided [with help from J] that I will now dedicate every thursday to my findings of creeptastical pics of a certain boy you all lust over these days. As well as whatever other celeb/singer/randomer I find that day.

Thursday Blogs are now so graciously named: Creeptastic Thursday.

cause everyone knows thursdays are the best days.

Monday= bad hair day
Tuesday= laundry day

Wednesday= Im never home day

Thursday= Best day of the week day

Friday= I never have time for anything day

Saturday&Sunday= Everyone else is busy Day(s)

So it obviously had to be thrusday. obviously.

And a side dish to my lovely blog: this just happened... at 6:19pm while Im writing this blog. My friend [we will name him later in my blog lifetime] just asked me...after I brought the subject up...what a manatee was. he. has. no. idea. end of story. *facepalms*

Anyway...As you Bloggers kind of should know already. I have a cat. named Jimmy. aka B. whatever. the point is, I have a story I wrote down in my journal a few days ago to share. Its something Jimmy and I had experienced together when I was looking out my front door and feeling insignificant the other morning.

oh and yes. thats him ->

ahem.

"As I held Jimmy in the doorway, letting him take in the fresh air, he looked at me. His green eyes wide and questioning, I answered "Yeah I know, its a big world out there B." he looked out once more and hiccuped."

It was sort of like a gulp of fear hiccup. I wanted to cry. Its as if he knew and was feeling the same exact thing I was. sort of a surreal moment with a cat if you ask me.

Xk

Ps. No Im not some sad lonely spinster with a zillion and 1 cats. I have one cat named Jimmy who I have interesting moments with. end of story.

Pss. Manatee found at exzooberance.com

Psss. Aunt. I am resending that invite to read my post A True Love Story. cause youre lame and wont read it like you said. *pouts*

Pssss. yes I edited this like. 4 times. I actually had typos this time. like. bad ones. yeah.

Cat food, Sex, and Freeze

you know youre hungry when: you open up a can of wet [nasty vomity looking] catfood and for a split of a split second it smelled good in your nose. yeah. Im freaking gross.
Im almost sorry that I feed him this sick goo. but he gobbles it up just fine, so I dont mind. I just tend to sit downwind from it while he eats. s'all good.

And for the record, Jimmys food does not look nearly as sickening as this picture I found on wikimedia. thats vomit worthy even for cats.

Oh! and before my rage cools, If I have to see one more KY Intense Commercial I swear I will flip out. You can almost legally admit me. yeah. So you cant advert cigarettes because thats bad for children to see and want. ok. cool. Soooo. whats the next best thing? Oh I know! lets advertise SEX! wtflip...

Anyway, I was watching the local weather person lie about how its going to be nice out for a change and I noticed her name. Amy Freeze. can we say irony? especially seeing as here in Chicago, it is about 85 degrees out. yep im in shorts and a tank top. and its spring. is this hell on earth? cause I kind of like it.

AND! hold your hats folks, cause Cookie [my horse for you lames that dont know] and I had our first horse show of the year! this past weekend, Cookie did so well. Im so pround I almost cried. plus I was dead tired which is when I tend to get whiney and moany...but still! We placed amazingly in all of our halter classes, even picking up two Grand Champion ribbons! CH-eahhhh! shes amazing, we're amazing. end of story.

Oh and since I havent posted and pics of him lately, here is another creepy picture of the lovely boy you all [want to] know I found on celebuzz.com:

Yeah....he needs to either stop making that face or do that all the time. it made me lol long time.

Xk

Ps. AUNT. A TRUE LOVE STORY. READ. UGH. [scroll down some til you hit pics of Cookie and I]

Pss. isnt it supposed to go pps? whatever.

Psss. Ive no idea where I found the KY picture. and frankly, I dont care. it bothers me. end of.